Horrible Perfection
by GreatTheWayIAm
Summary: Stevie Rae's whole family is going on a trip in the last four weeks of summer holidays. Only she can't go and so she is forced to stay over at her father's friend's place. There she will have to spend one month together with five boys - a nightmare coming true - if it wasn't for the oldest son. Will maybe this Rephaim-guy turn this horrible holiday into a perfect one?
1. Settlement

**Hello hello! Here I go again. I know that I should probably update _The Raven Prince_ since Rephaim and Stevie Rae are finally about to meet but I have so many story ideas on my mind that I'll start on them now, too.**

**Anyways, this story's title is _Horrible Perfection_ and I really hope it interests you. What I like about the first chapter is that though it is a story about Stevie Rae and Rephaim none of them appears in it (The chapter, of cause. It'd be weird if none of them appeared in the whole story, right?). The funniest thing was imaging Kalona as some normal guy working in a normal company. ( Imagine him wearing a suit and carrying around a briefcase =3 ) I like that idea.**

**Disclaimer: Do I own House of Night? Oh well, I would love to but I have to disappoint you. I don't own HoN.**

**~ Nessie**

* * *

**Chapter One – Settlement**

Jeffery Johnson was worried. He and his beloved wife had to go on a trip with their three sons. Why? The boys had messed things up again and seriously- you're better off not knowing what it was they did. However the consequence of that mess was that they had to make this little one-month-trip _with_ their parents. Not that Jeffery and his Virginia didn't raise their boys properly- this incident was more of an accident- but they couldn`t say _no_. There was only one more problem: There wasn't any more room for the youngest family member. Stevie Rae was not only the youngest member of the family but also the only girl- well excluding his wife. Jeffery didn't want to leave his little girl alone at home, neither could he. Stevie Rae was strong but the thing with her independence was still... Let's just say: going slow. So he had to find a place for his daughter to stay. Luckily he had an idea.

"Kalona!", Mr Johnson exclaimed.

The tall and muscular man turned around and while Jeffery still wondered where he got those muscles from doing the very same job as him all day the other raised his eyebrows in an excepting manner:"What is it that I can do for you, Jeffery?" Kalona was a friend of Jeffery and had children himself.

"Do you remember, Kalona, that I will soon have to go on a trip with my wife and sons?"

"I can recall.", the other man answered, no change in his face.

"So-", Mr Johnson began.

"Jeffery."

"Yes?"

"Split it out."

"Yes. Sorry. There is something I wanted to ask you..."

"..."

"Okay. Sorry. Again. Here I go: Five people of our family are soon to go on a trip. But we're six. Soooooooo- I was wondering where to let Stevie Rae stay-"

"And you want me to take your daughter for a month?"

"Er, yes, something like that..." The requesting looked at his old friend who just eyed him. Jeffery felt a little uneasy under his stare. He knew Kalona for ages and Kalona knew him for ages. What could possibly have changed within the last five minutes?

"Very well then."

"Huh?", Jeffery managed brilliantly.

"I will take your daughter."

"Really? Amazing!" Mr Johnson jumped, ran over to his friend and hugged him. He couldn't believe it. He had a place for Stevie Rae to stay. That solved eighty percent of all the problems he had at the moment! "Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you a thousand times! Oh I'm so relieved."

"Yes, but sadly-", Kalona began, braking free from Jeffery's hug, " I can not assure you that your daughter will have a good time. Neither can I say I will be at home. You are going the last four weeks of summer holidays, right? I will have to work then. The only companion she will have is my sons. And they are most certainly not used to a lady in the house. Do you think your Stevie Rae can handle five out-of-hand boys?"

"Oh, don't worry about that! Since she can handle three out-of-hand boys, five won't be a problem." That made Kalona chuckle. "Will she complain when something is wrong?" This time Jeffery had to chuckle. "You don't worry. As I know my Stevie Rae she is the unbeaten master at complaining."

"Well, then you will just have to bring her over by time."

"So, may I call you about the details?", Mr Johnson asked timidly. Smiling back assuring Kalona said: "Yes, yes you may."

Back home Mr Johnson was warmly welcomed by his wife. "Ginny, Ginny, guess what!", Jeffery almost yelled at her his eyes sparkling with excitement. "What?", she laughed. Jeffery grinned at her though the better word actually was _beamed._ "So, what are you so excited about?", Ginny asked smiling but with a hint of curiosity in her eyes. "I know where to let Stevie Rae stay.", he sang. "Really? You found a place for Stevie Rae?", she asked, her eyes widening. "Yup!", Mr Johnson beamed. "Oh, that's so awesome honey! Have you already told her?"

"No.", Mr Johnson sighed. To tell Stevie Rae would be the worst part of it. The fact that her parents wouldn't let her stay with Zoey caused a real uproar in their family. _Well, I don't have much of a choice, do I?_, he thought to himself. "I guess I'll go tell her then."

* * *

**Okay, that was this story's first chapter. Liked it? The chapter did pretty much explain what type of story this is gonna get, right? I had very much fun imagining this whole Kalona-the-normal-mortal-coworker-from-next-door thingy. **

**I hope you will review. It won't hurt- I promise!**

**~ Nessie**


	2. I don't wanna

**Helloooooo! Here is the next chapter of _Horrible Perfection._ Thanx for the reviews, I'm really happy you're interested and want me to write on. It's a good feeling to hear something like that. :)**

**And: Next Thursday the new HoN-book will be published in Germany! I'm so looking forward to that! Very well then.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own House of Night.**

**~ Nessie**

* * *

**Chapter Two – I don't wanna**

"No! No, no, no, no, no, no, no!", Stevie Rae screamed. "I don't wanna. No!" Her blond curls bounced with every pathetic movement the 16-years-old made. She angrily glared at her father who was standing in her room.

"It'll be fine, Stevie Rae. Kalona is a good friend of mine."

"Who cares? He's not my friend! I don't even know him! Why do _I_ have to go to _your_ friend's place? Why can't I stay with Z?", the girl yelled back in response. Her father's look hardened. "Because I know Zoey's family. This is no offend against your friend, Stevie Rae, I know it is not her fault but I will most certainly not let you stay with those people."

Stevie Rae didn't know what to answer. He had just offered her his honest impression of her bff's family and he had sounded very harsh. Still she couldn't give up yet. She wouldn't. Her daddy hadn't won this yet.

"Then why can't I stay here alone? I'm 16 already!"

"Are you serious?" Her daddy was giving her a look so cold she thought she felt her blood freezing. She gulped. "You, who can't cook, wash, clean, want to stay here alone? Is this a joke? You wouldn't survive more than a week, child. Know this: You might not see yourself as a kid anymore but, young lady, you are still far from being adult."

Stevie Rae gasped, She felt tears coming up to her eyes, and her anger growing impossible to be kept in. "You're ruining my summer! This is my life! How do you think your allowed to ruin it?"

Her daddy's face dropped. "I can't help it. I just can't let you stay here alone for a month. I'm sorry, Stevie Rae." Stevie Rae wanted to scream back but looking in her father's face- how he already begged her to understand- she couldn't. She was stubborn, yes, but not a bad girl. She hated it. She hated it so much but she was giving in.

"Fine. Let's leave it like that. I don't wanna go but you want me to so I will."

"Stevie Rae-", her father tried but his daughter interrupted him. "No. Not _Stevie Rae_. That won't make it any better. Just drop it, okay?" She gave him a fake smile. He sighed, gave her one more apologizing look and left her room. She herself sighed, too, and threw herself on her bed.

Man, this was annoying. She wished he had another option but she doubted she could find one. All her friends would be gone in the holidays and the place her daddy's friend lived wasn't even in Henrietta anymore. So she couldn't visit Zoey either, huh? _Oh my,_ she sighed again, _why me? Why does it always have to be me?_

Then she would somehow have to get along with these five boys she'd have to share a house with. _Great! Just great!_

* * *

**So, what do you say? It was a little short, I know. I hope you liked it anyways. **

**The next chapter will be about how Rephaim and his brothers are being told Stevie Rae will come. That chapter will be extra long and extra funny. Well, I hope you'll think it is funny.**

**Reviewing still doesn't hurt so: Please review! =D**

**~ Nessie**


	3. Chaos, A House Led By Guys

**Hey, here's the third chapter of _Horrible Perfection_. It's longer than the last one like I promised. I tried to make it a little more funny than all the others before. I actually really like funny stories and since this chapter introduces Rephaim's family I thought: _Why not? They are a family of 6 men and men sure can be dense at times._ ;3 **

**Nisroc is very stupid in this chapter, you'll see. He normally isn't, but this time he's really hitting the line to being crazy. He's pretty sharp actually, maybe it was because the lack of sleep? ;D**

**I hope you'll like it and think of it as at least a little funny. Before anyone asks: I have no idea how to pronounce the names of Rephaim's brothers either. I just put some letters into a row. Feel free to pronounce them as you like.**

**Characters and their ages:**

**Kalona ?**

**Stevie Rae 17**

**Rephaim 21**

**Nisroc 19**

**Revye 18**

**Equeiwa 17**

**Remn 16**

**Disclaimer: **

**me: I don't own anything.**

**Rephaim: You own them. * points at Revye, Equeiwa and Remn ***

**Nisroc: * stands next to his brothers feeling kinda left out * What about me?**

**Rephaim: She doesn't own you either.**

**Nisroc: Who is she even? Do we know her?**

**Rephaim: I don't think we-**

**me *hysteric*: Hahahahaha... That's enough of that. Let's start! **

**~ Nessie**

* * *

**Chapter Three – Chaos, A House Led By Guys**

"Boys!"

"Yes father?"

"Get down on an instant!"

"All of us?"

"Yes, Remn, all of you.", Kalona said. He was slowly losing his patience. He deeply and sincerely loved his sons, but they were, undeniably, a bunch of fools. And they were slow.

"Heeeeeeeey, father's calling us!", Remn yelled.

"Shut up, you goddamn little bastard!", it came yelled from a room upstairs.

"Bad enough you still cannot be quiet in the mornings, now you also torture us at day. How the hell do I deserve this?", it came from another room. Kalona needed only one more stupid answer to make him explode. Only one more...

"Go out, puppy. If you wanna howl at something, howl at the moon. It has an incredible patience, you know?"

"Oh, go to hell, Nisroc!", Remn shouted back.

"Trying to mess with me, kid?" The older appeared in Kalonas's sight. Nisroc had built up in front of his youngest brother and grinned superior. "You should better not be." His grin widened and contempt shone up in his eyes. "Don't underestimate me, Nisroc. Maybe messing with me isn't such a good idea either.", Remn tried to threat. With no success... "Hahahaha.", Nisroc laughed. "Sure."

"Oh, just drop dead, Nisroc."

Kalona was about to explode. Just how unbelievably stupid could these boys be? And why would Nisroc always have to start a fight? He already wanted to shout at them they should shut up, when he realized that nobody was talking anymore. He looked up and saw that another figure had stepped out on the stage. Rephaim. Kalona's oldest son had grabbed both his brothers and lied his arms around their shoulders. It looked highly ironic since it looked more like a situation that belonged into a teenage-girls-photo, not a fight. "So,", Rephaim asked in a calm but interested voice. "What might be the problem here, gentlemen?"

Kalona's eyebrows raised a little when he realized that Rephaim was going to put on an act. Yet, he had to admit, it looked gorgeous. Rephaim's acting always did. When he was acting you could see sides of the boy that were usually hidden. He was a person of few words and he wasn't the type for running around smiling without a reason either, so the fact how funny he could be was usually hidden.

"The problem is him!" Remn sounded stubborn- like a child. Well, he was only 16 after all.

"Gentlemen?", Nisroc asked, looking at his only older brother the same way he had just looked at his youngest. Despising. Rephaim shook his head. Nisroc was so obvious. His _lick-me-attitude_ might have been good and working on almost everyone, but Rephaim was better. For him as the oldest, Nisroc was just as see thru as all his younger brothers. He chuckled. "I am deeply and sincerely sorry. It was my mistake. I should have known better than calling you a gentleman. Despite that my question still stands."

"He was being mean, Rephaim!", Remn whined.

"He tends to be.", the older responded.

"He was too loud! Again! You can't tell me you are not annoyed!", Nisroc tried to defend himself. Kalona always found it interesting to see how fast Nisroc could switch from his mean attitude to the _why-is-nobody-ever-on-my-side _one. He was still a child, too, after all.

"I'm not."

"How, you're not?"

"I am not annoyed by Remn.", Rephaim answered innocently.

"Like I'd believe that for a second.", Nisroc grunted. "Why aren't you annoyed? Is something wrong with you? With collage? OMG!" Nisroc's eyes widened in shock. "Your stupid star studies haven't led you to myths, have they? Oh, who am I kidding, of course they have! And you started thinking of belief and stuff! From many to only one god... REPHAIM! You haven't become a monk, have you? That's terrible and you've kept it a secret! Why Rephaim, why? Why couldn't you even tell your family? We could have supported you!"

Kalona blinked downstairs. Was Nisroc stupid? He was so sharp usually. What was wrong with him? Had he really missed his older brother that much when he was in collage? But then, to Kalona's greatest surprise, Rephaim started playing along.

"But Nisroc,", Rephaim's face dropped. " I didn't know how to tell you. When brother Hubert asked me to join my heart was light with joy and-" Rephaim didn't come any further. "Stop!", Nisroc shouted with an angry face. Rephaim did exactly as he was told and grinned at his brother. "What did give me away? Me exaggerating it or the mere fact how stupid the idea of me being a monk is?"

Remn, in the meantime, had fallen to the ground, laughing like crazy about his brother's show- and he wasn't the only one. His other two brothers Equeiwa and Revye had approached the corridor as well to see what was going on and ended up rolling around at the floor, already turning purple for the lack of oxygen. Even Kalona had started laughing. His sons sure could be entertaining. Even Rephaim, who would normally show no interest in interaction with people. _Strange,_ Kalona thought. His ability of reacting quick would make him a good stand-up-comedian. Too bad he had no interest in things like that. But enough of the fun.

"Boys, down here!", Kalona said with all his authority in his voice. Each of the five boys froze in place. All expressions turned serious and all the boy's faces were now showing in his direction. Rephaim unfroze the first. He stepped over Remn, Equeiwa and Revye and made his way down the stairs to his father. Led by their oldest brother the other four boys fallowed. Kalona nodded approvingly.

"The second week of summer holidays is about to end."

"And?", Revye asked.

"Fool,"

"How can you be so clueless?"

And then it began. Everyone started talking the same time. And since it was impossible to be understood with everyone talking, they started shouting. But since they were now all shouting alongside each other they couldn't make themselves clearer than before, so they turned up the volume further. Kalona was about to snap, but then Rephaim- who had just watched the scene- spoke up: "Please go on father, don't let yourself get interrupted by these idiots."

"Idiots?", someone whispered a little offended.

"Idiots.", Rephaim confirmed.

Kalona, on his behalf, decided to take his son's advice and to make sure that he would try to figure out what made Rephaim so damn relaxed.

"Jeffery will leave his daughter Stevie Rae here with us from in two days and I want you- and just for the record: you will suffer endless tortures if you don't- to clean up."

"Cleaning up?" Nisroc raised his left eyebrow. He didn't seem to like the idea. Not that Kalona cared. "Cleaning up. There will be a girl living with us for a month and I do not wish for her to have to stay in a mess like the one you boys usually live in. As well I want you to move out of the bathroom upstairs."

"What?", Remn, Equeiwa and Revye shouted, their eyes wide.

"Yes, and the next thing I want you to do is to behave in front of her. She doesn't need to be confronted with actions like the one five minutes ago."

"With all due respect, father, that will be impossible." Kalona turned around to face the one speaking. He faced Rephaim. Thinking about it Kalona had to admit that Rephaim was right. His sons were mere troublemakers. They couldn't behave. Not even if their lives depended on it. "Do it less then. Rephaim, will you look after her a bit?"

"Yes, father."

"Very well then. And now go and do as I said."

**Nisroc's pov**

The brothers went back upstairs. Rephaim wanted to return to his room, but Nisroc held him back. Rephaim faced him.

"How?", Nisroc asked. His older brother's face told him he had no idea what he was talking about. "How could you not get annoyed by Remn?" Rephaim's face showed no expression. When he began talking it sounded like it was the most obvious thing in the world:

"Well, when I came home from collage Remn seemed to have the urgent desire to tell me everything, and I mean really _everything_ I missed _in three months_. After five minutes I only wanted to bang my head against my desk. I did- not that Remn would have noticed... Long things short: after that life changing experience I went to the city and bought these."

Rephaim opened his hand to show Nisroc what he meant. After that he went back to his room. Nisroc just stood there with his jaw dropped. Rephaim was a genies.

Earplugs!

* * *

**So, this certainly was a long chapter. Phew. =9**

**Rephaim studies astronomy. What do you think? I thought it was a nice idea and I wished you could see his room. It looks so awesome! Stevie Rae will try to describe it in a later chapter. His room is just so beautiful. **

**Hehe, I kinda like Nisroc in this story. The real reason he's so attached to Rephaim is that he needs him. Nisroc might be very clever and strong and stuff, but he stands no chance compared to Rephaim and the most important: Aside from Kalona, Rephaim is the only one who can get all his brothers under control. Without him there Nisroc had no chance. It was one against three, he never had the slightest chance. ;D**

**Please review.**

**~ Nessie**


End file.
